“Don’t allow your rituals to become ruts.” -Todd Henry
This quote really struck home with me. I have been struggling for the past six(ish) months with the feeling of being stuck. Part of it has to do with my constant urge to adventure and move but it also has to do with my unfortunate lack of change. And part of it has to do with the lives of those around me that seem to stand stuck in time.
I think we as people get stuck in a rut and we don’t know how to get out. It’s like a roller coaster you can’t get off of. I’ve watched so many people, some of whom I love dearly, live the same day over and over for decades. They say they’re happy and content but for some reason, it’s hard to believe that living a life of repetitive rituals can be pleasing and fulfilling.
When we live these kinds of lives, we don’t have new experiences, we don’t meet new people, and we don’t grow. Part of being human is growing. Without new experiences, we become stagnant and if we’re being honest, boring. Some of the most boring and unhappy people I’ve met are the ones who have 9-5 jobs, never leave their home town, and have had the same daily routine for the past twelve years.
Get out of your comfort zone and try something new! It can be small like taking a new route to work or huge like moving to a new country. Doing things that are new and different cause us to adapt and change. We need to change to become better people and new people. Who really wants to be the same person and do the same things until they die? Don’t live the same year 75 times and call it a life (I don’t remember who said this but if you do, let me know!)
I challenge you to do something new everyday. Maybe try a new coffee or go for a hike instead of your afternoon run. Whatever it is, break out of your rituals and try something new.
Hello! I’m here with my first recovery post and it’s a topic that sits really close to my heart.
I grew up being that skinny blonde kid with knobby knees and too much hair. I went through puberty just like everyone else except I did it with a life-ending eating disorder. My body was weird. Some months, I would look completely normal, and other times I would look emancipated.
My close friends knew I had an eating disorder and they knew I refused to seek treatment because I wasn’t ‘thin enough’. So I continued to suffer in silence for years and years until I was almost 14 years old and I finally received medical treatment.
But even though people knew about my problems, even though they saw how thin and miserable I was, I was still bullied. I was called fat and ugly. And it never ended. I was called names and shamed about my weight and my body up until I was 17 and decided I was done with listening to others’ opinions about my body.
I can still remember when one of my best friends told me I was ‘the skinniest fat person’ she had ever seen. Maybe she meant I was ‘skinny fat’ (something a lot of anorexics are with no muscle whatsoever’ but still. Why was saying that necessary?
Body shaming is more than just being a bitch, it’s about hating yourself. It’s about hating how you look and feeling insecure with your body and how you look. It’s about wishing you could look differently and not knowing how to love yourself. It’s about subconsciously attempting to make someone else understand how much you hate yourself.
When people called me fat, it wasn’t always because they were trying to purposefully make me hate myself, though sometimes it was. Many girls said these things to me because they were insecure about their own bodies and they didn’t want to be the only ones alone with their feelings.
I’m not suggesting you go out and become best friends with the girls who hated you and told you shit about your body but I am saying you need to understand that many of those women/girls/high school boys said those things because they’re insecure themselves. Stop listening to these people. They’re upset with themselves and unfortunately, they have chosen to deal with their problems with angry words.
So let them go. Let go of the hateful body shaming people and tell yourself that they are insecure with themselves and what they say is not a reflection of you but a reflection of them.
Life is hard, it kicks you in the gut and leaves you angry and hurt. When something horrible happens, why should we let it leave us in the dirt? We are better than that. Each and every one of us can choose how we react to things.
We may not be able to change what happens to us, but we can choose how we react. I’ll be honest, I’ve had a rough life and I have wallowed in it and let myself become depressed and uninspired. But that’s such a waste of time. All of us deserve to live a joyful, fun life. I know things happen that will rip your heart out, but pick yourself back up and keep going.
Life might suck, it might be hard, and it might be awful. But by finding the joy in life and staying positive even when you don’t want to get out of bed, that’s when you become the strongest.
Bring your own sunshine; don’t let anyone bring you down, don’t let the negativity in your life ruin your day. Make your own happiness, make your own joy. Bring your own sunshine.